Hard to say goodBye....i guess...

10th September 2004

u know u're thinking too much when out of noWhere u cried of yesterday...

that's what happend to me...yesterday (nite)...
i was doin some work..when i came across some old pictures..
n thought about this particular frend...
it was him ....the can't-live-withOut Frend

he's got his life now...n found another Me....
n i'm suppose to deal with the shit that happends...
n i am....

n i hate the things he did to me...
n the way he broke my heart..
n how painful it is thinkin on the things he said...he promised..
n the idea that i held on to those words..
tryin my best to believe it was..
for once...
R E A L
when every idiot knows...
BullS**** sometimes sounds so sweet....
n so pure......

its just.....
at every moment we try our best to forget...
we can't help it... when it comes back...
to haunt us...remind us... refresh us
of things...words..events..moments
and oh how i wish i was there...
back when everything felt so...
R E A L

but i cannot tell myself to forget
that he found another me...
and that shits happend...
n that i must move on...run for cover...hide...
whatever it takes

to say goodBye...
cause i guess its true what myX once told me...
i'm impossible to love...
because its hard for me to say goodBye
i guess.....

Cheers!

10.05am